Been graduated for over two years and the fine details of my post-collegiate life are still not falling into place as I had originally schemed. I suppose this a common complaint of recent graduates, not "fitting-in" to the "real-world." I am a product of Generation Echoboomers, not exactly Generation X and not quite Generation Y but rather a categorized limbo state. As children of the babyboomers, we are their polar opposite: expecting instant gratification, a constant source of praise, saturated in so many classifications of media, and moreover, utterly misguided. Okay, granted every generation thinks they're misguided but it's my generation, the Echoboomers, who are convinced that "no one told them the real world was like this." Let's blame our parents, teachers, television, college parties, ipod, Wii, anything but ourselves. No one told you that you wouldn't be able to get a job with a theatre and journalism double B.A.? Yeah, yes they did. You just didn't listen.

I "followed my heart" and now I have the paycheck to prove it. Yes, I plan to attend VCU in the fall of 2009 persuing theatre pedagogy but I can't resist the twinge of jealousy I feel towards others who are pursuing the actor thing in great cities. I think perhaps I've failed myself by not being 100% broke, working as a waiter, trying to do the starving artist cliche. Then again, no, fuck THAT. I'm paying for my very own first car and have to sustain bills anywhere from medical payments (thank you, America for having the SHITTIEST HEALTH CARE SYSTEM in one of the 'richest' nations), student loans to grocery bills. I suppose I'd rather have some sort of stability before I take a giant leap. As for now, I oscillate between being severely anxious over not immediately being where I want to be in life to being utterly depressed. I'm medicated for these mood swings but hell it's in my blood, even my grandparents are on the same medication. Now tell me what the hell does that say about the human race? Generation gaps collide when DNA produces the inevitable bullshit: we're all just as fucked up as our parents, and our parent's parents, and their parent's parents....

Makes me want to get high. Really high. So, in the spirit of lyrics from Godspeed! You Black Emperor, "We're on so many drugs with the radio on and the curtains drawn."